23 LGBTQ+ Habits That Straight People Can’t Relate To

Membership in the LGBTQ+ club often involves adopting certain habits (which might seem irrelevant to straight people) that arise naturally or are developed out of necessity.

Reading the Room Quickly

LGBTQ+ individuals often develop a rapid assessment skill to gauge how “safe” a space is. For example, when entering a new environment or meeting new people, they might scan for signs of acceptance or allyship—like rainbow pins or inclusive language on display.

Sharing Coming Out Stories

There are many reasons why some people choose not to come out, including uncertainty about their identity or feelings, a need for more time to understand themselves, or fears of facing harassment, bullying, discrimination, or violence. 

When individuals do decide to come out, they are often eager to share their stories. For LGBTQ+ people, exchanging these coming out tales is one of the most exhilarating conversations to engage in. Each story, reflecting a deeply personal journey, marks significant victories in their personal battles.

Exchanging Silent Gestures 

There’s a subtle, yet powerful gesture common within the LGBTQ+ community—the head nod of solidarity. This simple acknowledgment happens when LGBTQ+ individuals cross paths in environments where they might not expect to see one another. 

This nod goes beyond mere greeting; it’s a mutual recognition of shared experience, a silent expression of saying “I see you!”

Adapting to their Environment

Many LGBTQ+ individuals subtly adjust their behavior or appearance depending on where they are. 

This could involve changing their speech, clothing, or body language in conservative environments to avoid drawing unwanted attention and to feel more secure—perhaps it’s time for everyone to make them feel more comfortable?

Knowing Someone’s Identity Based on What they Wear

LGBTQ+ individuals often possess an intuitive skill to decode fashion choices that might signal someone’s identity. Subtler cues, like the way an outfit is put together—think mix-and-match patterns or certain styles that resonate more prominently within the community—can act as silent identifiers. 

It’s a quick, visual dialogue that helps in identifying ‘allies’ in different settings. 

Using Inclusive Language

LGBTQ+ individuals often lead the charge in using language that respects and acknowledges diverse identities. 

They might refrain from using gender-specific titles (e.g. “man” or “woman,” “boy” or “girl.”) or carefully use pronouns that reflect each person’s identity, setting a tone of inclusivity that others might overlook.

Celebrating ‘Unofficial’ Holidays

While many enjoy traditional holidays, LGBTQ+ communities might also celebrate dates significant to their rights and histories. For example, the Transgender Day of Remembrance (TDOR) on November 20 annually honors the memory of transgender individuals lost to anti-transgender violence. 

In the week leading up to TDOR, individuals and organizations nationwide engage in Transgender Awareness Week to enhance visibility for transgender people and highlight the challenges faced by the community. These observances are profoundly meaningful, fostering a sense of unity and awareness of their history.

Employing Humor in Advocacy

Often, humor becomes a powerful tool for handling difficult situations and challenging discrimination. LGBTQ+ folks might use wit to deflect uncomfortable questions, educate others lightly, or cope with the absurdities of prejudice, turning potentially tense moments into opportunities for connection and understanding.

Finding the LGBTQ+ Character in Any TV Show

For many in the LGBTQ+ community, identifying with characters on screen involves more than only enjoying a storyline. It often means actively searching for representation—a quest to find any character (no matter how minor!) whose identity or narrative reflects their own experiences. 

This habit stems from a need for visibility and affirmation in mainstream media, where such representation is not always overt or abundant. From picking up on subtle hints in a character’s dialogue, relationships, to even their style choices, this practice highlights the critical eye with which many LGBTQ+ viewers watch TV shows.

Creating Found Families

Beyond biological ties, many LGBTQ+ folks form “chosen families” with close friends and community members who provide the emotional and practical support that their relatives might not. Research indicates that individuals marginalized due to their sexual orientation or gender identity face higher rates of family rejection, mental health issues, substance abuse, and exposure to violence compared to their heterosexual and cisgender peers. 

These challenges are even more pronounced for those with intersectional identities, such as race, class, religion, or disabilities. Consequently, chosen families, friendships, and supportive community connections are vital for those who face familial rejection or seek deeper bonds with those who share similar experiences.

Eye Contact

LGBTQ+ folks often communicate through the secret language of eye contact. This non-verbal interaction can convey understanding, solidarity, or even shared humor across a crowded room. It’s a skill developed out of necessity, where verbal communication might draw unwanted attention or where discretion is valued. 

This type of eye contact can convey entire conversations—from acknowledging shared experiences to providing silent support—serving as a powerful means of communication that might even surpass spoken words.

Dodging Uncomfortable Conversation

Socializing with others can sometimes require a quick escape—a skill many LGBTQ+ folks refine over time. 

From sidestepping invasive questions or gracefully exiting a conversation about their personal lives, they have a mapped-out mental list of exit strategies that allow them to maintain their boundaries and keep the peace.

Syncing with Queer Time

LGBTQ+ individuals often operate on what can be playfully termed ‘Queer Time.’ This unique scheduling involves more than mere appreciation of punctuality—it’s their uncanny knack for timing their plans so they align perfectly with LGBTQ+ events and gatherings. 

Safeguarding Personal Boundaries

For many in the LGBTQ+ community, setting and enforcing boundaries is vital, especially regarding personal identity and experiences. 

They might be more vigilant about who they open up to and how much they share, trying to figure out when it’s safe to be fully themselves.

Rainbow Collection

Many LGBTQ+ individuals keep a discreet yet ready collection of Pride gear. 

Tucked away but always accessible, this stash can transform an ordinary day into a spontaneous celebration of identity, ensuring they’re parade-ready at a moment’s notice (regardless of the season!)

Transforming Everyday Spaces into Places of Acceptance

LGBTQ+ individuals often have a knack for turning ordinary locations into safe zones—a skill that’s particularly noticeable in public spots like coffee shops. 

They might choose a corner that offers both visibility and privacy or arrange seating to foster intimate, supportive conversations. This ability to create a space of comfort and affirmation in typically neutral environments highlights their determination to promote inclusivity everywhere for those who might be lacking it.

Listening to LGBTQ+ Songs 

LGBTQ+ folks often meticulously assemble music playlists that celebrate diversity and queer artists. These playlists blend a variety of genres and voices—from vintage tracks to modern hits—creating a vibrant soundtrack that supports and uplifts the community. 

This thoughtful selection aims to create a space (even if it’s just auditory) where identity and expression are celebrated and shared.

Making Friends Almost Instantly!

There’s something almost magical about how quickly LGBTQ+ folks can forge deep connections upon meeting. This shared understanding and mutual respect can often lead them to dive into personal histories and life stories (probably earlier than they should!)

Reading Between the Lines 

With a keen eye for nuance, many LGBTQ+ folks become adept at spotting queer subtext in media. This might be a lingering glance between characters or an ambiguous dialogue that hints at more than friendship. 

This natural radar is a developed skill for identifying representation in mainstream narratives, celebrating even the subtlest nods to their existence.

Surviving ‘Annoying’ Relatives with Grace

Handling family gatherings with a mix of diplomacy and wit is a refined skill for many LGBTQ+ individuals. 

They become masters at steering conversations away from personal hot topics to more neutral ground, preserving both family harmony and their own peace of mind during these interactions.

A Keen Intuition for Recognizing Allies

Many in the LGBTQ+ community possess an intuitive sense for allyship, often identifying supportive cues in people’s behavior or language before these individuals fully express their allyship. 

This sense can feel like a sixth sense—spotting an ally from a mile away (sometimes even before they make their support explicit!). 

Finding Community and Support Online

LGBTQ+ individuals often excel at finding their tribes in the digital landscape—be it a subreddit, a microblogging platform, or a specialized forum—they can pinpoint communities and resources that resonate deeply with their needs and interests. 

Feeling Excited about Themed Gatherings

There’s a special enthusiasm within the LGBTQ+ community for themed events, from Pride celebrations to creatively specific costume parties. 

This zest involves more than showing up—they often lead the charge in energy and spirit, making these gatherings memorable and vibrant celebrations of identity.