Motherhood often can get really lonely. Having a newborn is incredibly stressful, especially if you don’t feel as supported by your partner as you’d like to be. In addition, there’s sleepiness, exhaustion, or anxiousness about your unborn baby. So how can you cope if you are feeling lonely during your pregnancy?
As a first-time mom, it is totally normal to feel emotions such as isolation, depression, and anxiety. After all, being a mom is a huge deal and pregnancy is really hard. But it’s important not to let your emotions out of your control.
Initially, it’s important to anticipate the feeling of loneliness, identify the problem, and figure out solutions. Here are some strategies that might help if you are feeling lonely during pregnancy.
How to Cope with Loneliness During Pregnancy
1. Recognize You Are Feeling Lonely
Ask yourself whether you are feeling isolated and lonely. Once you recognize the pattern, it’s easier to find a solution. Identifying the problem is important; otherwise, you will not realize there is a real problem to be solved.
2. Reach Out to Family and Friends
If you do not open up about your feelings, no one will be able to tell how you truly feel. So, sit down and have a conversation with someone you trust sharing about what you’re going through. It also gets the load off your chest and makes you feel lighter rather than bottling it up like an overflowing cup.
You have every right to feel happy, so try to find a friend or family member you can confide in. Spend more time with family and friends who care about you. You can always find someone with whom you feel comfortable and create a rotation of visits so that you are not spending too much alone with your newborn.
3. Find Support Groups
In any situation you’re in, it is always comforting to surround yourself with people that are going through the same thing. Other people may not understand why you behave the way you do or do certain things differently, but having a group of people that you can relate to in such difficult and rare times is so important.
Connect with other expecting moms, either at work or just in the neighborhood who are also going through the same thing and make plans with them that you all can enjoy while being pregnant. Apart from curing boredom on the weekend, having a community will bring you support in ways others cannot. You will be more willing to talk to them about your pregnancy blues, and they will be understanding.
Mommy Groups can be a great resource for all moms. If you are active on social media, you will find local mommy groups on Facebook. You can talk to them via message and plan meetups. Also, look for invites to playdates and baby classes where you can meet other moms. It’s really helpful!
4. Discuss With Your Partner
You need to find a balance between motherhood and self. Nothing tests a relationship like raising a child together for the very first time. Be honest with your partner about how you’re feeling. He is likely feeling the same. It might also help him to know that you miss him too in a time when all focus is on the baby. When you find time and energy for each other be vocal about how it feels and what you need. If you are a single parent, discuss issues with other new parents or family members.
5. Spend Some Alone Time Daily During Pregnancy
Things definitely do change after you have kids. It’s hard in the beginning, but it gets better. You do have to be intentional about making time for yourself. Pick your favorite movie, or order take-out after the kids are in bed, or even just play a random video game. Give yourself a break you deserve it. It is hard work taking care of a baby. You will be fine.
6. Your Baby is Your Company
After a certain point, the baby inside you can actually hear things and should start kicking by then. This is the perfect time to spend some quality time with the baby. Since the baby can hear, in fact, it is possible to develop a connection that early. Research suggests that singing during pregnancy can improve both your pregnancy blues and the brain development of your baby.
Start by simply singing songs for the baby in the womb. In some cases, if the baby likes what it hears, it may start kicking. The amount of joy you get when your baby first starts kicking is enormous, and it will guarantee you to feel happy and excited. Some mothers even go to the length of actually talking to their baby as if it is actually there. It is proven to be effective in creating an emotional bond between a mother and her child because this allows the child to become familiar with the mother’s voice.
7. Find a Hobby
Do something you love to do. It is a very effective way to help relieve your loneliness and depression during pregnancy. You can even go the extra mile and invite friends to do hobbies with you. Staying at home all day with nothing to do can lead to severe depression because you start to overthink every little thing like, “what if I can’t be a good mother?” or “how do I know if I’m doing it right?” Of course, you have a lot to worry about since you have a baby on the way but don’t let your mind get caught up in unnecessary fears.
The best way to keep your mind busy and distracted from any negative thoughts is by indulging in hobbies. You can reignite your passion from your teenage years or start a completely new hobby that you’ve always wanted to try. Especially when you’re on maternity leave, you will have a lot of time on your hands to try new things. Just make sure that your hobbies are safe for you and your baby.
8. Celebrate Your Pregnancy
Embrace the fact that you are pregnant. You can show excitement through little celebrations. The most obvious one is having a baby shower. Get all your friends together and have a fun baby shower with delicious snacks and lots of presents. Throwing a party just for you and your baby is sure to bring your spirits up and help you enjoy your pregnancy a bit more. If you’re looking for something smaller and more personal to do, then you can have a professional pregnancy shoot. It can cheer you up immediately and get rid of the lonesome feeling.
There are several other ways you can celebrate like, belly painting, belly cast, etc. These little things will keep you occupied and can even improve the symptoms of pregnancy blues. Positivity is key to maintaining a healthy mental state during times like these.
9. Spend Quality Time With Your Loved Ones
Sometimes taking a stroll on a nice weekend to the park, or grabbing some simple lunch might work wonder for you. It helps you have some fun away from home and improve your mood because you’re away from home. It’s together time with family that you can enjoy. These simple things really do go a long way!
Physical intimacy is an important factor in a relationship. Make time for it. Even just a cuddle can improve your mood instantly. And always find the time to continue to appreciate one another and show each other love and affection.
10. Don’t Try To Be Perfect
Don’t try to do it all by yourself. You can’t do everything that you think you should. Chasing perfectionism puts you at risk for depression, anxiety, and stress. Make time for yourself to rest, fun, and relationships.
Planning your day loosely and taking some time for self-care will probably be the biggest help. Don’t feel guilty looking at the Pinterest perfect moms. Virtual life doesn’t represent the real picture. You will get better with time.
11. Seek Professional Help
If you feel depressed and lonely all the time, it is high time to seek professional help. Speak to your healthcare provider—get the support and answers you need. Let it be your motto, “No new mom will suffer alone.”
We are more powerful than what we give ourselves credit for. Take control of your life, moods, and state of mind, if not for yourself then for your baby. You can even start some moderate pregnancy exercise program if cleared by your physician. Be strong and know you aren’t alone in this journey.
It takes some effort to cope with loneliness and isolation during pregnancy. By anticipating the psychological problems early and taking steps to mitigate their impact, you can spare yourself significant distress and have a far more positive experience in your life.